The love of Marriage (Husband to Wife and Wife to Husband)

                                                   

It has been since December 29th of 2001 since my wife and I said "I do"                                        to each other to share a life of love in sickness and in health: remembering the times of poor health which were sometimes scary but pressed us together as a couple and as a family.  For richer or for poorer: with all of the decisions we have had to make regarding our finances, seeing the Lord has provided for us all these years and because He is faithful will continue to provide.  Till death do us part: I am so glad that I waited for God's best "Help" that she is definitely meet (intended) for me.  In Genesis 2 the Lord defines for us the only design of marriage that will operate in our world that being one man with the same woman for life.  The relationship used throughout the Bible as a picture of the Love God has for His people as Paul spells out for us in his letter to the Ephesian church "Husbands, love your wives as Christ, loved the church and gave Himself for it."  That idea of Christ giving Himself is sacrificially even to the death on the cross.  We husbands allow far too much ego in our lives that it takes the gentle behavior of a godly wife to tone it down. 

Ephesians 5:25 says, "Husbands, love [agapae] (unconditionally) your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself for it."  This verse addresses the husbands unmistakably,  and even the four letter word "love" that follows gives an unmistakable description of what kind of relationship a man is to have with HIS wife.  My wife and I have had many years of wonderful marriage as I have already said; I am not saying that I have been a perfect husband all those years of this God given marriage.  The word love in this context is telling we husbands that we are to act upon a caring loving supporting protecting providing; did I say loving service and yes I mean service for after all we are to be like Christ; that is the goal in life to be conformed to the image of His [God's] own son, (Rom. 8:29), and that is the context of these verses in this letter to the Ephesians.  Man was not made to dominate the wife, to abuse, to mistreat, his wife; that is ungodly, selfish, and replaying the incoming of the curse in the garden of Eden, when God asked Adam what did he do; Adam's only response was to put the blame on his wife.  We are to be like Christ and Christ never put the blame on the church for not listening to His leadership, but He said, "Father forgive them for they know not what they do". Christ is sanctifying us to be confirmed to His image.
I can say with out a shadow of a doubt that if we husbands lived this way there would be less divorce in this world because of example of the effects of love of Christ in the husbands life.  The picture of marriage has been attacked because it goes against the ideology of a secular world system.  We live in a day where good is looked on as evil and evil is looked on as good or acceptable or normal.
The struggles in the marriage unit began when sin entered, as well as all human struggles; when Adam and Eve ate of the fruit, disobedience on man's part opened their minds to a broad path of life where the narrow way of obedience was once the path taken.  When sin entered then the curse; the Bible says that for the woman she would give birth in pain and that her desire would be to her husband and he shall rule over her.  The love between the husband and the wife should be as though the wife is to be helped to build a life at home; after all the wife is leaving her life that she has known and the mom and dad she has had for her all of her life...she is now starting from scratch, venturing out with someone who she has not known in an intimate way.  She is leaving everything she knows to go with a new person in their new life.
When I was dating my wife and we both became more interested in each other  the relationship began growing faster and stronger than I realized .  During a Christmas break while on the phone, Colleen informed me that her parents were concerned about the relationship their daughter was in with this skinny guy from Illinois.  If that wasn't a big enough clue; still the reality didn't hit me until shortly after I got off the phone.  It only took a short moment when it came to me...I needed to ask her Dad for his daughters hand in marriage.  When Colleen was brought back to school I had to take the opportunity to ask her dad that probing question.  I finally built up the courage I got my answer..."Yes" in so many words.  To Colleen there was that protection in her years growing up, after all giving up the only daughter who has added so much help to the family and ministry over the years, would take away from life as it had been.  

     Well after  22 years  and 7 children later, the love of marriage as illustrated in life as it is intended to be as Christ's love for the church, life continues to be very adventurous.  Adventurous for sure with the many trials of health being apart, our family continues to grow as God brings trials to test our love for one another.  See, we are to be like Christ, Romans 8:29 says, "For whom He did foreknow, He also did predestinated to be conformed to the image of His Son, that He might be the firstborn among many brethren."  Christ endured many trials and struggles as we will have to endure.  The vows "for better or for worse" give a fresh new meaning when life slams the worse it can bring and strongly remind the couple of their vow "for sickness and in health".  When sickness plagues life it tries the faithfulness of the two who repeated those vows.  At one moment you find yourselves at home comfortably enjoying the homestead, then a pain reaches its ugly hand into the mix and soon your off to the ER because of a deep cut above the eye or a cut on the eye or a tooth that has become infected.  If anyone has been in the ER before I am sure they make it as uncomfortable as possible on purpose, which has been my family's experience; a strong pain that we wish could be comforted quickly only to find there are several people before you waiting then an immediate emergency comes via ambulance and supersedes all others, to only have to wait even longer.  Another synerio of which results in a visit for a tooth pain with infection only to be told after the CT scan that there was a spot found that could be cancer but not to be sure.  The reality of life alliterating events invade the mind and imagination begins to torture the nights sleep as well as the idle thoughts during the day.  "Let God be true and every man a liar; as it is written, That thou mightest be justified in thy sayings, and mightest overcome when thou art judged." Romans 3:4. 

    The example that Christ has set before us to be committed to no other and to remain faithful and true though all the hard times is the path a couple MUST go.  This would be a picture to the world of what Christ has done for us, and for them.

There is Light in a dark world

Romans 1:16-2:2

For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to everyone that believeth; to the Jew first and also to the Greek.
For the Wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who hold the truth in unrighteousness;
Because that which may be known of God is manifest in them; for God hath shewed it unto them.
For the invisible things of Him from the creation of the world are clearly seen, being understood by the things that are made, even His eternal Godhead; so that they are without excuse:
Because that, when they knew God, they glorified Him not as God, neither were thankful; but became vain in their imaginations, and their foolish heart was darkened.
Professing themselves to be wise they became fools,
And changing the glory of the uncorruptible God into an image made like to corruptible man, and to birds, and four footed beasts, and creeping things.
Wherefore God also gave them up to uncleanness through the lusts of their own hearts, to dishonor their own bodies between themselves:
Who changed the truth of God into a lie, and worshiped and served the creature more then the Creator, who is blessed for ever. Amen.
For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature:And likewise also the men, leaving that natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another, men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompense of their error which was meet.
And even as they did not like to retain God in their knowledge, God gave them over to a reprobate mind, to do those things which are not convenient;
Being filled with all unrighteousness, fornication, wickedness, covetousness, maliciousness; full of envy, murder, debate, deceit, malignity, whisperers.
Backbiters, haters of God, despiteful, proud, boasters, inventors of evil things, disobedient to parents,Without understanding, covenantbreakers, without natural affection, implaceable, unmerciful:
Who knowing the judgement of God , that they which commit  such things are worthy of death, not only do the same, but have pleasure in them that do them.
Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art that judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself: for thou that judgest doest the same things.
But we are sure that the judgment of God is according to truth against them which commit such things.

2 Peter 2:1-9
But there were false prophets also among the people, even as there shall be false teachers among you, who privily shall bring in damnable heresies, even denying the Lord that bought them, and bring upon themselves swift destruction.
And man y shall follow their pernicious ways; bu reason of whom the way of truth shall be evil spoken of.
And through covetousness shall they with feigned words make merchandise of you; whose judgment now of a long time lingereth not, and their damnation slumbereth not.
For, if God spared not the angels that sinned, but cast them down to hell, and delivered them into chains of darkness, to be reserved unto judgment;
And spared not the old world, but saved Noah the eighth person, a preacher of righteousness, bringing in the flood upon the world of the ungodly; 
And delivered just Lot, vexed with the filthy conversation of the wicked:
(For that righteous man dwelling among them, in seeing and hearing, vexed his righteous soul from day to day with their unlawful deeds;)

But there is a promise through all of the times of judgments of God

The Lord knoweth how to deliver the godly out of temptations, and to reserve the unjust unto the day of judgment to be punished.

The darker it seems to get in this world there is a Light that shines brighter to dispel the darkness.  

When entering into a dark room there is a certain fear that enters our thoughts.  The fear of the unknown, the unknown out come of the present circumstances of pain; will the pain be long, will it bring long term medical conditions...our imagination can go on and on; even the thought the of possible death.  Darkness has always been the illustration of fear and/or evil.
John 1:4-9 says 
"In Him (Jesus Christ) was life; and the life was the light of men.
And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended  it not.
There was a man sent from God, whose name was John.
The same came for a witness, to bear witness of the Light, that all men through Him might believe.
He was not that Light, but was sent to bear witness of that Light.
That was the true Light, which lighteth every man that cometh in to the world."

The Light is Jesus Christ, who made this universe, (including you and me), and He knows the way that we should go, the way we should live, the way we should talk, and the way we should think.  The contrary ideology of Satan and God are like "Night and Day" Darkness and Light.  No matter the decisions of countries that are contrary to God's way of life He intended for us, He has all things under His control.  We can put our trust in Him to know what He is doing is right and just.  As for man kind we have others to contend with but contend with we must as God has told us in His word.
Micah 6:8
"He hath shewed thee, O man, what is good; and what doth the LORD require of thee, but to do justly, and to love mercy, and to walk humbly with thy God?"